Listen to the hype lately? They say you need to optimize your life, focus on the 5-step (or 3 or 7 or 19-steps, the number doesn’t matter) formula and get in on the quick wins. Who are they? They are the experts catching your attention. And you feel like an impostor still?
They all promised to solve all your problems…. I ask you, did any of it really click for you?
You crave depth. You seek mastery. You want craftsmanship and prestige. So why are you still looking for the quick-fix, easy solution?
I think it is because of the impostor complex.
What Is That?
You know. It’s that niggling belief that you don’t know enough, aren’t experienced enough, are not competent.… in spite of all the training, experience and results that say you are.
The complex (a.k.a., the Impostor Syndrome) relates to these twin curses:
- Knowledge– you don’t really know how much you do know, and
- Expertise– your fear you’ve forgotten how it really feels to know little and bask in your naiveté.
Is that all there is to it? Really? I thought so, but then…. I found myself chasing the next bright shiny object. Ignoring my own inner wisdom.
Are you? If so, take inventory of your “self.”
What is self-leadership?
“Self-leadership is the key to creating a framework that has you relying more on yourself than on gurus or can’t-lose formulas.”
~ Tara Gentile
It is the engine that drives craftsmanship and excellence. It isn’t about being more productive. It really is about being more effective. You don’t have to produce more. You must make what you’re doing really count, instead.
It’s not about finding the fastest shortcut to success. It’s about making intentional choices.
It is using what you perceive around you and choose action that’s rooted in who you are, what you want, and the experience you’re creating for customers. It is not doing things the way everyone else does it because it is the norm.
[tweetthis]Did you hear me? It is staying grounded in who you are, whatever you are doing. [/tweetthis]
That is the exact opposite of what feeling like an imposter does. You keep quiet when you should to speak up. It pushes you to play small – not to launch that product, not to post the article, not to send that email.
There lies the lie fostered by the complex: it keeps you asking “Who am I?” instead of letting you stand confidently declaring “This is who I am.”
Fixate on Your Weakness
Now, that’s the dangerous thing.
By its very definition, feeling like an impostor keeps you fixated on your weaknesses. Take a minute and think about it.
How do you feel when you’re feeling insecure? I bet you are defining yourself by what you lack.
- Not smart enough.
- Not experienced enough.
- Not good enough.
Saying those things to yourself makes you deny your strengths. It keeps you focused on what you lack.
Bottom line is that when you accept yourself as an impostor, you stop working to leverage what is working for you. Your energy is poured into changing what’s not working. And that’s all cockeyed!
It’s what we’re taught to do:
- If you don’t know something, go learn it.
- If you can’t do something, practice will make perfect.
- If you fail, try, try again.
- Ad nauseam
This is the second lie: that you need to fix your problems. When, in fact, you’re transfixed on your problems by the impostor complex.
It is this lie that leads us to try every quick-fix and hack known to man.
Things Are Hard
Yes, there are hard things. And, hard things are hard for you to do. That’s the nature of the beast
Yes, you don’t like it when things are hard. So, it is easier to turn to formulas and tactics and hacks to make things easier.
This is another lie. That you need to be good at the things you are not. That’s a story you tell yourself.
Each moment you spend trying to fix something you’re not good at is time you’re not spending to master something you are good at.
Every time you operate outside your sweet spot, you miss the opportunity to serve someone inside your sweet spot.
No, I’m not saying you can’t learn new things. That’s not a bad thing. No!
But the danger is that if you don’t focus on what you’re trying to create, the experience you’d really like to create for your clients, you lose the opportunity to do something truly beautiful and prosperous.
Take the High Road
I feel strongly about this, can’t you tell? I see it all the time. I’ve done it myself.
I constantly meet business owners who want to do x, y and z in their business model. They see video courses, multi-month coaching programs, multi-media membership sites, and more. All promising riches beyond their comprehension.
All that ad noise makes them feel like impostors. Why? Because in order to compete, they need to do the same or so they feel. They need to give more value, create more content, have higher production values, and on and on and on.
Have you stopped to ask what it is that prospects and clients want from you?
Your very best clients don’t want to work with you because of the things you can’t do. They want you for the very things you can do well.
The key to being successful in your business is to make everything grounded in your unique makeup and what you bring to your business. Your skills, passions, point of view, quirks, all form the basis for developing your unique business strategy.
[tweetthis]And that will make you successful. [/tweetthis] Not full of hardship, challenges, pain, or toil.
It isn’t supposed to hurt.
Are You Ready to Stop Hurting?
If you are ready to step up, stop hurting and create your own intentionally inventive strategies, make an appointment to discover how one my programs can help you today.
Back to You
What do you think? Have you ever feel like an impostor, like I have? What do you do to turn that feeling around and feel genuine?
Share below, won’t you? I like to learn new techniques to combat the impostor complex.