Have you observed this in yourself? How about in others? I know I have seen it in myself… Sometimes you can get in the way of your own success, blocking the flow. So, have you decided to be a success yet?
Part of the trouble is that you race after success not really stopping to decide what success is for you. The result is that you rarely are successful because…. well, you are trying to live someone else’s idea of success.
Instead of figuring out what your success looks like, you twist yourself into something trying to align to their vision. Doing so takes tons of energy and effort. The results are always disappointing.
Social pressure pulls you off course. It distracts you from your own inner guidance.
Success <> Accomplishment
I worked for a very large organization once. After my first performance review, I became painfully aware that the working definition of success at that place was: the longer hours you work, the more successful you will be.
My boss explained to me that someone else had gotten an excellent review and salary increase to go with it because they consistently worked 20 hrs. overtime a week. While I headed a multi- million-dollar project and got a large group of company VIPs to agree on how to proceed with the project!
Yes, I worked extremely long hours. But it was to accomplish my goal of creating something new, better for the company. Not because it’d be approved of by my hierarchy. I thought there was value in my effort to accomplish the goal. It didn’t happen. Instead I was relegated to second class, exhausted and unhappy.
As I look back, I am so grateful. This position was the straw that broke the camel’s back, so to speak. I realized that I’d never be truly happy while I worked for other people, particularly ones that had such a skewed sense of success.
I got tired of following the idea that successful people are supposed to want promotions & more money, no matter what the cost.
Is This You?
Are you one of those people who grab willy-nilly at a chance of success:
“Yes, success… I want that!
What do I need to do to get it?
How can I be like them?!”
Are you trying to get something and not considering why you want it? Are you letting only external factors to make it happen?
I know that success is a very personal thing. Your definition of it is very different from mine. Each of us defines success a little in our own way.
The tendency is to compare and compete with other people’s versions of success: ‘Why am I not as successful as X? I must try harder!’ It is easy to become disappointed when you perceive that X can do it much better than you.
But the thing is…They’ve found their definition and you haven’t found yours!
Shazam! Change Happens
Once I realized that I needed to have my own definition of success, my life changed.
I was done trying to shoehorn what I wanted into what my current employer wanted. I let go of following my family’s, my husband, other people’s dreams of success. I got down to the business of defining my success. It was a liberating moment.
What success is comes from the inside-out. Blindly following what someone else says you should attain is like starving your soul of divine light.
Claim Your Own
Here are some steps to define your own success:
Create your own definition
Screw what everyone else says success is.
You’re talking about you as a unique human on this planet. Stop trying to fit into someone else’s shoes and ‘make do.’ What does success look like, sound like and feel like for you? Maybe it’s flying 1st class to business meetings! Maybe it’s having a better balance of home and work life. But whatever it is, let it be yours alone.
Claim it for yourself
[tweetthis]Be a pioneer. There’s no one else out there like you. Be the leader in your life. [/tweetthis]
Follow your intuition and what Spirit is telling you. Step out of someone else’s footprints. Intuition is always there; it never goes away. There is inner guidance for your higher self. Be prepared to listen to it.
Become the role model for others.
Define what you need
You won’t find success fully developed as you turn a corner. You’ll grow into it (trust me on this one!) You have to nurture it.
To develop success, you need self-awareness, vulnerability, openness, and a willingness to do things imperfectly. And, you need to stay true to yourself.
Decide what you need to make success flourish and make them happen.
Feel the fear; do it anyway
Being afraid is a natural reaction when you’re leaving your comfort zone. Feel the fear and do whatever it takes anyway.
Confront your fear and laugh in its face. Decide not to be paralyzed by it. Life is way too short for that! Work through it and find your courage.
[tweetthis]The best things I have ever achieved have scared the bejeezus out of me! [/tweetthis]
But, here’s the thing about being scared:
You’ll feel the most alive – it’s exhilarating to go through fear!
You’ll reach a new level of transformation.
You’ll get some awesome results.
Get someone to support, challenge you
There are many coaches out there who just focus on being supportive. This is good. But, it doesn’t let you stretch and become your best you.
You want someone who will do both: support and challenge you. Because, to claim your success, you need both!
I am here to help you, if you’d like. Make your appointment here.
[tweetthis] Your successful life is waiting for you. Start claiming it for yourself. Right. Now. Don’t. Wait. [/tweetthis]
Tell me, whose definition of success are you using right now? Are you using your very own? Share your thoughts in the comments below.